Oh yeah, this looks legitimate.
Discarded early drafts of this sign:
FREE CANDY!
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CHEAP MAMMOGRAMS:
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SPEED-DATING
Single? Unattached?
No one who will miss you should something terrible happen?
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Meeting For The NO KIDNAPPING Club
Are You A Pretty Lady Who Hates Kidnapping And Wants To Discuss It With Other Likeminded Individuals?
Us too!
We Are Definitely Not Kidnappers!
Come To Our Meeting And We Will Totally Not Kidnap You!
(No Cops)
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KNOW HOW TO MAKE A PROFESSIONAL-LOOKING NOT CREEPY SIGN?
We could use your services
Please bring a resume and portfolio to the
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Auditions:
Female Singers With Nice Feet
Must Have “Cute” “Petite” Feet
Must Not Get Weird About Us Taking Pictures Of Your Feet
Bring Sheet Music (Accompanist Provided)
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HEY LADY SINGERS!
Come Into This Dark Mysterious Building, Why Not
Worst-Case Scenario The Endless Cable News Coverage Of Your Almost Certain Grisly Abduction And Gruesome Dismemberment Followed By Lengthy Trial, Interviews With Cops, Friends, Loved Ones, Lifetime Movie, Book Deals For All, Early Home Movies Taken “In Happier Times,” Etc., Etc., May Bring Some Much-Needed Exposure To Your Fledgeling Musical Career
Building at Corner
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